Moana 2 (2024) review

Dir. David Derrick Jr, Jason Hand, and Dana Ledoux Miller

By: Steve Pulaski

Rating: ★½

Moana 2 is so bad, it recalls The Jungle Book 2 in the realm of unfortunate Disney sequels that somehow earned the privilege of gracing thousands of theater screens. That this was originally conceptualized to be a limited series on Disney+ is all you need to know about a flat and uninspired follow-up to one of many Mouse House gems from the 2010s. Such works as Wreck-It Ralph and Zootopia are distant memories, as Disney has spent the following decade suggesting there might not be a more creatively bankrupt powerhouse operating today.

The past two Thanksgiving holidays have shown us just as much. Strange World looked a bit like Atlantis: The Lost Empire and Treasure Planet, but had no storytelling poise to supplement it. Last year’s Wish felt like it was straining itself to manufacture feelings of hope and wonderment all while facilely celebrating the company’s indelible legacy. Moana 2 is the most offensive because it’s working off of a quality foundation.

Instead of building upon its predecessor’s themes of authenticity, tradition, and finding one’s agency, this is a sequel that fails Moana the character. It gives her little to do in the realm of advancing her status as a Disney hero, subjugates her friend to an 11th hour addition, and subjects her to a vast array of insufferable supporting characters in a film with a sparse narrative.

The film opens three years after the events of Moana; its titular heroine (voiced by Auli’i Cravalho) still set on breaking the curse of Nalo that has exiled her people. She is desperately searching for the mythical island of Motufetu, which has the ability of uniting the various cultures that exist amongst several islands. Moana leaves behind her parents and little sister Simea (Khaleesi Lambert-Tsuda), and sets sail across the ocean with a crew.

God help anyone who could stand to be on a floating vessel with these individuals for more than five minutes and not throw themselves overboard. Moana’s expressive pet pig and cock-eyed rooster prove quickly to be the most intelligent souls beside her. This is what happens when you have a cantankerous farmer named Kele (David Fane), a creative architect in Loto (Rose Matafeo), who thinks it’s wise to deconstruct the boat while they’re in the middle of the ocean, and a cocky, self-absorbed warrior named Moni (Hualālai Chung) in tow. Where’s Maui (Dwayne Johnson), you might ask? He’s held prisoner by a witch named Matangi (Awhimai Fraser) for most of the first hour. By the time he becomes a pivotal player, you’re likely to be checked out.

Let’s assume that the structure for a one-off Moana series on Disney+ was readily in place when executives decided they could make a killing reworking the project into a full-fledged feature film in time for the holidays. That might explain why Maui wouldn’t show up until later in the story, say, the third or fourth episode. This narrative structure fails a feature film, which is devoid of adventure and logic even by its own rules. At one point while at sea, Moana says, or, rather sings, to the ocean asking for a “push.” The ocean responds by guiding their vessel. Why couldn’t the ocean kick itself into high-gear and transport everyone in tow to Motufetu in a quick time?

The script (written by Jared Bush & Dana Ledoux Miller) is predicated on setup, with little payoff as a reward. Maui escapes his prison upon the arrival of Moana and the gang, removing any kind of dramatic possibilities. That’s not even accounting for the trip, with the most notable diversion involving the crew being abducted by a tribe of coconuts. It’s absurd, even for an animated adventure movie, and it kickstarts one of the film’s greatest weaknesses, which is a reliance on juvenile bodily humor. So much of the jokes in Moana stem from slime, muck, and goo being vomited onto characters. Were the storyboards for the ill-fated series so dark that suits made Bush and Miller insert misplaced sight-gags?

In effort to extend the threadbare plot to feature-length, Moana 2 is also a musical. After seeing (and enjoying) Wicked less than 24 hours ago, I shouldn’t sound so glum about that, but when the elixir of the original film in Lin-Manuel Miranda is missing, that explains why the songs lack a spark. Ironic how even the film’s best musical number, Dwayne Johnson’s “Can I Get a Chee Hoo?,” mirrors the melody of “In the Heights.” Miranda should take it as a compliment, and a reminder on why his name isn’t on the finished product.

The animation proves to be arresting. The ocean looks deep, the colors shine bright, and the textures of various creatures appears dimensional and artistic. Such is to be expected from a film that’s budget rivals the GDP of a small country. It’s lipstick on a pig as far as I’m concerned. Moana 2 is a terrible, waterlogged rehash that underscores Disney’s current era of creative bankruptcy.

My review of Moana (2016)

Voiced by: Auliʻi Cravalho, Dwayne Johnson, Hualālai Chung, Rose Matafeo, David Fane, Awhimai Fraser, Khaleesi Lambert-Tsuda, Temuera Morrison, Nicole Scherzinger, Rachel House, Gerald Ramsey, and Alan Tudyk. Directed by: David Derrick Jr, Jason Hand, and Dana Ledoux Miller.